new site.

mhm. :]

www.xanga.com/street_lightss
go there. ^

comment/subscribe there.
i'll return the favor. :D

also, add me on myspace;
myspace.com/43067262

thank you guyssss!
<3333.

i NEED a job.

ughhh.
this homecoming thing has me ALLLLL stressed out.

homecoming is saturday.
i need to go tanning. twice. [$16]
i need a necklace. [i saw a cute one at walmart, $5]
i need a black bra. [$5-8]
and i need my homecoming ticket. [$18]

AND. i don't have ANY money at all to pay for this stuff. my parents gave me money and told me to spend it wisely because thats all i was getting.
and well..who knew that the ONLY dress that looked okay on me was more than half the ammount my parents gave me.
i needed shoes..so i had to get ones that matched my dress..

and my parents are being retarted and saying i can lay out in the yard.
in the 60/70 degree weather. are you fucking kidding me? seriously..

i don't even know how i'm going to do my hair yet.
any ideas?
i kindof want it either down and curly, or half of it in a pony tail, and half of it down..and curl it.

BUTTTTT..idk how to use a curling iron. and my mom sucks at it.
and i don't think any of my friends would want to curl my hair before the big dance. :/

i REALLLLYYYYY need a job..

i really like this style. but my hair isn't THAT long..

time for a change.

 so i've decided that i don't want to do the whole "i love him, i miss him" theme anymore.
because the more i write about him, i think about him. and the more i think about him, it makes me want him back.

and i just got myself to get over him.

so for now on, i'll just write random thoughts on here.
but i'm pretty sure that there will be SOME entries about him still.

and i'm not going to put only black and white photos on here.
i want color. :]

a new entry will be up later.
<33333.



myspace.com/43067262
^ let's talkkkk. :]

comment 4 comment?
sub 4 sub?

i thought you were someone else..

i've come to realize that you're just like all the other guys.
you lie, you cheat, and you make us believe something that's not even true.
you made me feel things that weren't even there.

i gave you my everything, while all along you faked it.
i hate you. i hate you, i hate you, i hate you.

honestly, if you weren't with your friends, you would've been fine with me.
i told you that if you kept doing what you did, it would ruin us.
you obviously didn't care, because you let it happen anyways;
even after that night of you begging to have me back.
i knew why i wouldn't, but i changed my mind about you, because i loved you.

you're so pathetic.

i hope all the other girls know about your fucked up little games that you play so you can get what you want, not even thinking about other peoples feelings.

you need to grow up and stop what you're doing..because once people find out, they're going to say "what the hell was he thinking?"
and then no one, not even me, will want anything to do with you.

i hope you know what you're doing, and i hope what you choose to do with yourself makes you happy..
because no one else will be there for you like i was..

 

i can't believe you for what you've done.
& i can't believe myself for letting me fall for you every time..

i'm afraid..

..it's different this time.
usually, when we aren't dating, we stay friends. really good friends; when we still hold eachother, and kiss eachother, and we still say "i love you" before we hang up from talking on the phone.
but this time, things have changed.
we stopped talking. no hugs, no kisses, not even a single phonecall.
i miss you so bad, it keeps me from sleeping, and from concentration. the only thing i concentrate on anymore is you. it feels like someone put a weight on my chest. literally.
it's hard because when i think about what we HAD, and what we HAVE now..it just doesn't make any sense.

i know you promised me, that we'd be together again.
so what am i so afraid of?
maybe i'm afraid that if we DO get together again, things won't be the same.
maybe i'm afraid that because we haven't talked in so long, you don't want anything to do with me anymore.

i'm afraid of losing you, and i'm afraid that you'll never love me again..

"I love the way you said you'd always love me; I love the way you looked at me with eyes that reassured every promise you made. It's not so often that you stumble upon someone who makes you feel on top of the wold. It's even less often that you find a good way to hold onto them and keep them within your reach, because once they are gone, you've lost them for good.."

maybe that's what i'm afraid of..

i love you.